Sunday, April 20, 2008

Monday Blues....

The weekend felt good and I was more relaxed than previous weekends......I thought I was getting more used to work but somehow, waking up this morning I have my doubts about myself all over again......
Faced with a cross road of sorts looking to where I should be going with this job......the challenges weren't what I had expected and are mounting up.....feeling terrible about the things I need to do.....Probably because I do not have full ownership of a project that I am consciously handling myself which will make me feel more responsible of the outcomes......

Another crossroad came about where I need to think about my resume outlook.....I look like a rojak in the making...not knowing where I am headed.....Went into various industries that just happened to offer me the job.......but on a long term view I still do not know where they are headed.....Yes, I am in work now, in an agency but somehow I don't feel up to it right now.....refer para above.....

Furthermore, some job offers pertaining to my previous industries which I am familiar with have recently came up.....1 from logistics and the other from banking......I referred joey into the finance job but myself feel tempted to join him to......and yet the full outcome of that decision is also in my mind......that there are targets and it will not be a long term solution to anything but yet at the same time, this feels like what I was made out to do.....

In the process of all these turmoils, I have also talked to my mom and she has mentioned the situation....that at least this is a 5 working day job (but there is also the hidden implication that I have to work late and be on my toes the whole time)......and i don't have the stress of meeting targets every month....so in a sense i won't be out of job......

I guess I really need to set my mind on something and just go for it.......in the meantime......i will go for my smoke break.....hahhaha

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